Hi everyone. Sorry it’s been a while. The kids and I recently started school, so the blog got temporarily put on the back burner.
I received a couple comments on my unschooling post of a couple weeks ago. I really appreciated the feedback and was mildly surprised, as I hadn’t even had time to announce the blog anywhere. Rather than let the comments slide by, I thought their intelligence and eloquence deserved a proper response. Not that I have real answers or anything, but they bring up good points that deserve further dialog. So, without further ado, here goes:
OrganicSister said...
Hi! Stumbled across your blog and found this post interesting. Here is something to think about...why can't you find the time? If you have the time to sit down with books to teach, don't you then have the time to go explore nature? There are tons of single parent unschoolers who do it; with determination, you could too! Best wishes!
Always testing boundaries,
Tara ;)
Thank you Tara for your response. When I say I don’t have the time, I mean it in a big way. I am currently going to school full time (three hours drive time, five days a week), and pursuing various avenues at earning a living. The only way I have time to “sit down with books to teach” is by making the most out of a lot of drive time, and working with the children while I am doing my own school work.
Tammy said...
Hey there,
I personally think that using labels in this kind of situation is problematic. The reason being, is that the term "unschooling" means different things to different people. It's hard enough when there are two people who are living together to talk about what kind of homeschooling to do. But when it's a divorce situation, you aren't there to see the interactions, and to understand first hand how it's working. (Assuming that the kids are with your ex-wife most of the time.)
Basically, you're their dad, and you have a vested interest in their lives and learning, but you aren't there to share it with them. You want to know they are learning and you have every right to know that. And to see that.
I am with my children the majority of the time. My ex-wife has our two younger children almost a third of the time, and the oldest, not at all. While I am not there to see how things really work when the kids are with their mom, I have a decent understanding of what they are learning and what they are not. I completely agree with your unstated sentiment that children can learn from unschooling. I just also believe whole-heartedly that the mere fact that a child does not “do school”, does not mean they are unschooling. As I stated in a previous post, unschooling can be a wonderful, fulfilling way to learn and grow up.
So, I think instead of looking at it from an "unschooling" or "not unschooling" perspective, perhaps work to find the specific things you would like to do to stay connected with your kids and their growth. The more specific you can define your needs, the easier it will be to find a solution. If you look at the big picture of "education", that's impossible to tackle. But if you look at specific things, like, say, "making sure that their needs are being met. When they are curious about something, do their questions get answered? Are they being exposed to new stuff often? Are they being given opportunities to practice things they like to do? Do they get a lot of human interaction on a daily basis?" Things that don't fall under a category of "homeschooling styles", but rather fall under the category of "the important things in life."
Here, I will have to interject again. What if the answer to some of the above questions is a resounding “no”? As I said, I am quite aware of the day to day experiences of my children, and they are not always given the parental time and energy needed to fully pursue many of the things they are interested in. Do I feel guilty about this? Of course. But at this point, all I can do is to gear their “school learning” toward things they are most interested in, whenever possible. No, they are not neglected children. They are, however, the victim of a divorce by two very busy parents.
If you and your ex do not agree on the "important things in life", then THAT's the issue, not unschooling or eclectic schooling. If you can figure out how to pinpoint the actual issues and deal with them on an individual basis, the "way" to homeschool will become clear. Not on the grand scale, but bit by bit, small thing by small thing, until eventually, it will add up to one big thing.
Make sense?
Good luck with everything.
http://justenough.wordpress.com - my alternative education blog
Thank you very much for taking the time to comment. In many ways I do agree with you. There are some fundamental aspects of raising children that my ex-wife and I disagree on. We are beginning to work together a little better as time passes, so hopefully this situation will improve.
Folks, once again, I am NOT bashing unschooling. I have nothing whatsoever against it with regard to learning or general living. I understand that unschooling is a way of life for many people. It is something I have studied deeply, and I have incorporated many of its tenants into my own child-rearing life. As a matter of fact, my children’s mother had never heard of unschooling until I introduced her to the idea many years ago. My current “problem” with unschooling is of a personal nature. I want my children to have the best life possible. For us, at this moment, taking into account the needs of my children and the schedules of their parents, unschooling does not seem to fit into our lives – even if we wish it did.
Kevan
